October 12-13, 2009:

The ear, the nasal stuffiness, the raspy throat continued to plague me these two days, making a lot of stuff simply harder. Concentration shot because of labored breathing and a strange occasional clicking in my right ear which I found I could control by pressing on the lower part of the trigenimal nerve under my chin. Bizarre, but doable.

Heidi and I went for a morning at the Paradise City Arts Festival on Monday, and I actually bought stuff for me (for once)–an autumn coat (size small!!! though I think the coats ran large)–a new pocketbook, a thing to hang earrings on, and a turquoise top (very warm) for sitting in the cold house writing.

Writing. Now there’s a thought. I did a pass over SISTER BEAR (about two hours worth) making some changes an editor had  suggested and with which I heartily agreed. I worked on a poem about the fir tree in the side yard (another hour). I answered tons of email. Waded some more through piles of stuff.

Tuesday, I went to the writer’s group for the first time since May 26. Everyone was there and it was wonderful seeing my friends again. As always, interesting stuff read, strong critiques pointed and helpful. And then Barbara Goldin and I went off for tea (me) and hot chocolate (her) to discuss our Bible book. I think we got a lot solved.

Came home to do some fiddling on the Bible book (two hours), some rearranging. To bed early. I seem to be over jetlag but not the damned ear/nose/throat thing.

I don’t know if other writers are terribly fussed by physical ailments, but this sort of thing bothers me enormously. I want to write, but my head wants to think about my ear or my nose or my heartburn or. . .or. . .or. . . . It makes me hate myself for whimpishness.  And then I fuss about that. Sometimes I can bull through and get so involved with a piece that I honestly forget ailments. But other times, I seem to be captive to them. A slave to a runny nose!

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